Owning Your Power and Setting Boundaries That Heal with Stephanie McAuliffe

In this episode, sisters Amy and Nancy Harrington, founders of the Passionistas Project, speak with Stephanie McAuliffe, a boundary strategist and international bestselling author. Stephanie shares her journey from 27 years on Wall Street to becoming a transformational energy healer. Discussing her difficult upbringing in a household marked by alcoholism and trauma, Stephanie explains her passion for boundaries and healing. She details her transition from corporate life to her current work, exploring the connections between her past experiences and her energy healing practice. Stephanie delves into the importance of setting boundaries, how it impacts personal growth, and the specific challenges high-performing women face. She also discusses her books “Message in the Bottle” and “The Impact of Silence,” and outlines her vision for the future of her work and for empowering women to live in their own truth.

Listen to the full episode HERE.

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ON THIS EPISODE

[00:19] Meet Stephanie: Boundary Strategist and Author

[01:14] Stephanie's Childhood and Early Life

[03:07] Career Journey: From Wall Street to Energy Healing

[05:53] The Turning Point: Embracing Healing and Boundaries

[16:15] The Importance of Boundaries and Healing

[18:49] Big T and Little T Trauma: Understanding the Differences

[22:56] Empowering Women and High Performers

[28:25] Stephanie's Books and Personal Insights

[33:48] Future Aspirations and Final Thoughts

[39:01] Closing Remarks and Passionistas Project Sisterhood

TRANSCRIPT

Passionistas: Hi, we're sisters Amy and Nancy Harrington, the founders of the Passionistas Project, an inclusive sisterhood where women come to find support, purpose, and empowerment. On each episode, we share stories of passion-driven women who are breaking barriers and redefining success. Today we're talking with Stephanie McAuliffe, a boundary strategist and international bestselling author who empowers leaders to own their truth without apology.

She fuses 27 years of Wall Street experience with transformational energy healing to help clients clear the past and create a powerful future. So we're so excited to talk to Stephanie today. How are you doing? We're glad you're here. I'm

Stephanie: awesome and I'm honored to be here with you both. Excellent. So what are you most passionate about?

Boundaries and healing. And very few of us grew up with boundaries. We grew up with rules that were disguised as boundaries, that actually were used to control us rather than empower us. So I am all about shedding the rules of the past and healing our stories and standing in our power.

Passionistas: So let's go back to your childhood boundaries or lack of boundaries. Tell us where you grew up and what your childhood was like.

Stephanie: I grew up in the suburbs of Boston. In a family that knew multi-generational functional alcoholism and silencing and trauma and abuse and some mental illness. If you're familiar with the adverse childhood experiences, I can count seven of 10 and there was, it's very interesting because it's middle class household.

It had all the trappings of what I call the middle class, so clothes on my back, food in my belly, a roof over my head, a home that looked nice. And yet there's something that I call the separation of church and state, and it's if as if what's within the four walls of our home is church. There's rules and there's an upstanding and a way we need to be, and yet what's projected outside, which I call state, is something very different.

And so it can really cause us to question like, what is, what is my truth? What, how, what happens if someone finds out? What's really happening in our household and it puts you into all of fight, flight, and freeze, which is exactly what I experienced. And there was a lot of silencing. We don't talk about these things.

We don't air our dirty laundry. A lot of the phrases that a lot of us grew up with, and I didn't realize it wasn't normal until I moved out and got into my career.

Passionistas: Yeah. So how did you get out? What, what were the steps? What, did you go to college? Do you take the normal route that kids take?

Stephanie: I did. Um, I went to college and then, oh, fell in love, moved to New Jersey and soon after, started working on Wall Street.

I was in systems and then project and program management, and I did everything I thought I was supposed to do. I did the career thing. Uh, my last gig was an $85 million four year global transformation program for a very large insurance company. And when we completed that, I was looking around saying, is this it?

It wasn't as satisfying as we are taught that it's supposed to be. And. They were beginning layoffs. So I took a package, so I was a senior director at that point, and then all of a sudden sat with this space of what do I do with my life now? Because a year earlier my marriage had ended and I started going deeper into my own healing and started really looking at where did I come from and what did I really grow up around?

And I started to see the threads of the spiderweb. Then as I wrote my first book in 2017, I really began to see the dysfunction because it's easy to, I had gone to Al-Anon for years, and 12 Step is great if you've, you know, grown up around alcoholism and even dysfunction. And I, I connected with a lot of other people's stories, but then I started looking at mine.

And it was rather shocking to s to realize, whereas when I was on Wall Street, I thought I had the, the world by the, you know what? I really realized how little I had and how much I was trying to control things out out of my own fear year. There were a lot of layers to unwind and unravel and to look at the gaslighting.

And the dysfunction and the toxic codependency and the lack of boundaries and the lack of even, you know, how do you not stand up for your daughter who's been sexually abused, who's six years old, like really questioning how effed up certain things were.

Yeah. So once you started to really unpack all those things, how did that start to impact.

Your life.

Stephanie: Mm. It opened things up and it's really interesting. I had, um, I think we all have moments that are catalysts for us, and in 2017, I was still living in New Jersey. There was something, it was a joint day of meetings between AA and Al-Anon called gel. And I had never been to an AA meeting, even though I had married two alcoholics and I was surrounded by them all my life.

So I went to an AA meeting and a man came in and he told the story of how his father had forced him to do heroin together when he was a teenager, which is horrible. No one should ever do that. But then I led an A COA adult Children of Alcoholics meeting, and the man came in and told the exact. Same story, and it was like this light bulb went off of, I saw how stuck people were in their stories.

And I had already started to explore energy healing, and that was when I really, instead of experiencing it, I went into some deep training because I said, well, maybe I can start healing myself. And then I did all the different levels. I'm a holy fire three criminal reiki master. I've received my own symbols, I've studied with world renowned healers, and I like to say energy work completed the sentence.

And it's meant to be a metaphor because 12 Step and therapy are great, but sometimes through that we put ourselves in a box. That man in that meeting was in his box. I had been in a box, and the box gives us safety. It gives us our labels and our walls and our definition where we can express our traumas and our stories and share with like-minded people.

And then there's a point of, aren't you tired of telling that story?

Passionistas: Yeah. Yeah. So it seems like a huge, huge leap to go from financial systems and Wall Street to energy healing. So what's the thread there that connects the two of those places for you? There's a

Stephanie: There's a couple of threats. I have done a lot of work with my younger self as well as past life work, and one of my memories from I was probably about 18 months old, I was in my backyard and I could see the blades of grass and how they were connected.

And being in systems has always been, how did the pieces of the puzzle fit together? And that's even the work that I do with clients now, it's, they'll come to me with something and we'll start to explore the thread back to see how the pieces fit together, and then work to clear the energy. So it's all, it's all PI call it our spiderweb.

It's really, it's the pieces of the puzzle and how they fit together that create the story that we're living.

Passionistas: Was there a specific moment that you were working on Wall Street that you decided, okay, this is it. I'm, I'm done. I need to go a different way.

.

Stephanie: Yeah. When I was looking for, um, my next gig and I knew, uh, rifts were coming.

And I said, well, what am I gonna do a a hundred million dollars project? Now it's, I had just spent four plus years grinding, because when you're managing a large program, you're really rarely off. And I just said. I don't know that I wanna do this anymore. And I did a short consulting engagement, really enjoyed it.

Created what would've been a program management office designed for them. The company wasn't ready. And I went to a retreat north of Toronto in the middle of July, and one of the presenters was a woman who had left corporate and was standing on stage. She was now a coach. And I remember sitting in the back of the room and I was bawling because it was like that weekend.

I gave myself permission to say, I don't wanna do this anymore. I don't know what's next. And I am going to allow myself to be in that liminal space because I just, I've done it for 27 years. I, I don't need to keep repeating something that I loved for a while. That it's time to say, you know what? Our relationship, it's, it's time for it to come to an end.

Passionistas: So what did you have to unlearn about success and productivity or even your own identity in order to step away from all that and build a new life on your terms?

Stephanie: One of the first books that I read, well, not first, but one of the really impactful, uh, books was the Fear Project. Which is a great book, and I don't even remember 10, 12 years ago I read it and the author talks a lot about all the different ways that fear impacts us and how fears used to control us.

And I started to see how much I had led my life by the fearful. And it goes back to that separation of church and state of what if somebody finds out. How I really feel. What if somebody really finds out what I'm thinking? What if somebody really finds out where I came from or what happened in my life and the abuses and, and so it was a lot of unwinding and unlearning.

And when I first left Wall Street, I truly did not know what to do with myself. And I sat on my couch for a couple of months. Hmm. And I gardened and I went to workshops and, and this was when, so it was 2016 and there were a lot of Hay house events, you know, full day long. I'd go to Philly for the day and see different people and that's where I connected with Kalet, barriers Reid, Dr. Joe Dispenza, and a number of other, um, practitioners. Some I loved, some I didn't. Those two I love and I really, I gave myself the opportunity and the permission to play and explore, which when I was so driven in my career, my to-do list drove my day to day. I didn't really have time to be, I was always doing, so it's been a slow.

Procession or progression of letting go of doing and allowing myself to be and explore and not feel like my answers have to be perfect out of the gate.

Passionistas: So it's a big leap from. Doing that for yourself and helping other people do that. Mm-hmm. So what was the inspiration to you to start coaching and what were some of the challenges that you faced in making that shift?

Stephanie: So I first started working with, um, families of Alcoholics because I thought that was what I was going to do. That was my first book, the Message in the bottle. And I did work with some women. Um. Who were still married to alcoholics who'd grown up around alcoholism, and it just didn't, it was almost like the end of Wall Street.

It was good. I was very good at it and I knew there was more. So that was when I really got into the energy healing because first of all, there's a lot of families of alcoholics who just want to get their loved one to stop drinking, and then they think everything's gonna be perfect. Well, sometimes we have just as much recovery that we need to do as they do, and it was not about convincing anyone, and I allowed myself to play and I did Oracle card readings for a while with people.

I still have an amazing, um, abundance. Six card reading that I do every now and then that goes really deep. That can inform your path for upwards of six months, prosperity and abundance, and then more energy healing. And then I traveled for eight months in 2019 and then moved to Provo, Utah. Right before the pandemic started and I had plans to travel and speak around the world, and the universe had other plans for us, and then I went through and healed breast cancer.

And so there was a lot of, it was almost as if the universe was. Slowing me down to connect me with what it is that I've really been meant to do. And as I moved through healing breast cancer and moved beyond family members telling me, get out of your arts artsy lifestyle, and you don't know what you're doing, I started to get into the boundaries work.

And even more so when I moved to Texas to care for my father in his last nine months of his life, and now with the passing of my mother, it, it continues to deepen this work. And it's really profound because boundaries are sexy, boundaries are superpower, and people are so afraid of them. We're terrified of being a, of, of being abandoned or rejected.

And yet when we don't set a boundary, we're actually abandoning and rejecting ourself.

Passionistas: Yeah. So talk a little bit more about being a boundary strategist. What, what exactly does that mean and what's your approach? So we

Stephanie: So we look at. Our formative years always, because that informs a lot of, and did you even have boundaries?

What were the rules? What were the dynamics? What was, did you grow up in an authoritarian household? Was there the bypassing of emotions and stories? So, and the separation of, or the dynamic of church and state are three of the big patterns that many of us grow up with. And then also looking at our resentments.

So in a way, it's kind of bringing everything up to the surface, and it's not therapy. It's when we know what it is that's there, that's still triggering us, then we get to choose how we wanna move through it. So looking at. Did you grow up with a parent with mental illness? Did you grow up around alcoholism?

There are, and there are many energies that we take on either through past DNA generational trauma, the people that we're growing up around. So we're looking at kind of the alchemy of all of these pieces and then the energy healing part of this is, some of it is this life, some of it is past life. We'll have.

Blocks within our body that are kind of like, if you think of something you haven't been able to express, it's almost like blowing a bubble, except you're swallowing the bubble and when the bubble pops, all that energy sticks to your inside. It's why so many people have stomach issues. We carry anger and frustration in our liver, in our kidneys, you know, that's why we can literally be.

Pissed off. So it's looking at how all of these pieces fit together and clearing the energies. Sometimes there's energetic attachments as well. There's cords to clear. So the initial part of the exploration is really to identify what it is that this person and their person's higher self wants to clear to free them to move forward cleanly and clearly I think it's important.

Passionistas: I don't think people understand necessarily this, but can you explain the difference between Big T trauma and little T Trauma?

Stephanie: Yes.

Passionistas: And why it's important to know that distinction.

Stephanie: Yeah, so for example, big T trauma is my stepbrother sexually abused me for four years. The small T trauma is that people within the house knew it.

Did nothing to protect me and we didn't talk about it. And so the small T trauma is like death by a thousand paper cuts because you know, they know, you know, you're not being protected, you know, you're not being taken care of. And, and in many instances, at least from my own personal experience, I disassociated from myself because the pain was so great.

How do you not protect a child, especially when their abusers living in the same house? So the big T trauma is the, the act and the small T trauma is the, the not giving the space to heal and bypassing what's really going on now. In some cases, there are generations before us who were never taught how to process their emotions.

There are many generations in my family who have experienced abuse as well, and we're not protected, and it doesn't mean that we can't break the cycle to choose something different for our children or somebody in our care, or someone that we love. Say that's not okay. And I think we're seeing a lot more of that now.

There's actually, I saw on Instagram, but it's also on TikTok. There are adults who are sitting in their car or in their home with their child and they're starting a phrase of children should be seen, and then they let their child answer it. Hmm. And the way these kids are being raised, they're breaking this cycle, which is amazing.

There's a whole generation of children who are not being taught in the way that many of us were, and yet there's many of us of certain generations who still have a lot to.

Passionistas: Yeah. Yeah, we were definitely the sweep it under the rug generation. Like don't talk about that. No one needs to know that. Our dad died and at the funeral, his mental health came up and his family, his immediate family, his five children were the only people who knew what my sister was talking about.

Everyone else, not a clue. We didn't talk about it. Don't talk about it. Don't upset dad. Don't talk about it. It's amazing.

Stephanie: Well, well, and there's also this thing of your, your status in society mm-hmm. Is based on how the family is seen. Yeah. And that's where that fear of what if somebody finds out what's really happening, what if someone finds out how this really is so, and in certain societies or certain places around the country.

So when I was first interviewing people for my second book, the Impact of Silence, uh, a good friend of mine who's African American said in the South, families had to keep secrets because that was how you protected the family. So it wasn't about somebody finding out what was happening, it was because there was so much tension in the se racial tension in the South.

You didn't want anyone. To know your business. So there's different dynamics with different, um, cultures. Yeah.

Passionistas: And let's talk about women specifically. Is there a pattern of belief that you see come up over and over with high performing women or conscious leaders that you work with?

Stephanie: Yes, because many of us are trying to strive and prove that we are good enough.

Mm.

Passionistas: Yeah.

Stephanie: A and, and it's, and there's a lot of layers that come with that, but really it is proving that we are worthy to someone who showed us, who projected their own, I'm not even gonna say, showed us that we weren't. There are many who project their own unworthiness and our brainwaves are so wide open up through the age of eight.

That we absorb the energy of the people we're growing up around. So if you grew up with a mother or a father who did not feel worthy, who felt insecure, more often than not, you took that on through no fault of your own. And that's another reason why I focus on energy healing, because there's things that were these invisible things we're fighting that we don't understand where they came from.

Like, why do I feel like this? Why is it never enough? It may be through no fault of your own because you grew up in a dynamic that couldn't necessarily have supported you in the way that you would've liked because you were being raised by people who were living out their own life.

Passionistas: That's fascinating. So many things going through my head right now about like, oh yeah, dad. Dad, I love this work. It's interesting to grow. We grew up in a high, a household where our mom was actually the complete opposite of our dad. Very nurturing and loving, and. Very, like lots of stability, you know, but she allowed his behavior to permeate the house.

So, but, and that's a lack of boundaries. Yeah. So there's totally a lack of boundaries. There were rules for sure, but there was, you know, there no, there weren't really boundaries. It's fascinating. I never looked at it from that perspective.

Stephanie: No. And, and I've talked with many people and they say, what's a boundary?

It's, you know, a motor around a fence or, or I mean, a moat around a castle or a fence around a property. It's, but there's physical, there's mental, emotional, energetic, and spiritual boundaries, and you know who we do and don't let into our life. And how much. Frankly, I think everybody needs to be taken off of a pedestal because you may have more knowledge than me in a certain area.

It doesn't put you above me. It doesn't put you below me. So there's a lot of people from the spiritual perspective who have gurus and like, I won't do anything without my guru telling me what to do. It's like, why are you giving so much of your power away? So as we create stronger boundaries for ourself.

It's like our strength emanates from the inside out and in many ways we don't need boundaries anymore.

Passionistas:  Fascinating. So when someone comes to work with you, what's step number one?

Stephanie: Step number one is looking at what are you, what are you most frustrated with right now? What is this thing that like you've.

Most people that come to me have already done a lot of work. They may have been to, to therapy and or 12 step. They've read books, they, they're at a point of, I can't stand this anymore. So we dive into what can't you stand? What is it that you haven't been able to move beyond? I had a client a number of years ago who was still challenged with her mother.

And this is, this is a woman who is a trained hypnotist, so she does her own energy work, and this is where we need to classify the levels of energy work that are done because it's just like doctors. You're not gonna go to a dermatologist for heart surgery. But anyway, this client, um, in a couple of sessions in, in the last one that we did, I saw her as a fetus in her mother's womb with her feet pointing to her mother's heart and all this black tart energy coming from her mother's heart down into her feet.

And we cleared that. Her mother had a lot of hate, she had a lot of resentment. There's a lot of things we take on in the womb. And she's, she said, you know, over the years there's been little things that have come up. She said, I thought I was gonna have to live with that for the rest of my life. And we cleared it.

So part of it is she was very willing to let go of it. If you don't wanna let go of a story, doesn't matter how powerful or the gifts anybody has, it goes back to that box that we create for ourselves. And so we look at. What's here, what's very present for you, and then we start to work the spider web out.

Passionistas: So you've mentioned, uh, your books, the first one, Message in the Bottle and your new book, The Impact of Silence. So tell us a little bit about the two books and what you hope readers get from

Stephanie: them. The Message in the Bottle: Finding Hope and Peace Amidst The Chaos of Living With An Alcoholic is, um definitely edgier and a little rawer than the second book. It, it reflects where I was when I wrote it in the winter of 2017. Um, so it's seven, eight year, eight years ago. And it is, uh, self-help memoir. There's a lot of introspective questions in it to help the reader explore their own journey with growing up or living around.

Alcoholism, and it can be functional alcoholism. I have people in my life who went to work, but then they came home and the drink started and we think of that as normal and it's very normalized.

The second book, The Impact of Silence: Reclaim The Sovereignty of Your Soul has actually been published twice. It was initially published a little over three years ago, and. It's a further into my journey and was written while I was, um, initially written while I was undergoing treatment for breast cancer and working with my naturopath and my allopathic doctors.

And then I moved here to Texas to care for my dad. And, and after he passed, I was like, all right. Universe, what do you want me to do? And the book wanted to be rewritten. It wanted a new voice. So it's probably about 60% different, but each chapter has a, whereas the first book has a lot of interest about a lot of questions at the end of each chapter.

The Im the latest version of the Impact of Silence has one invitation at the end of the chapter. And their processes that I've created, I've, everything that I offer, I've done for myself. And you can open up the book like an Oracle. Each section is meant to be its own little Oracle section. So you could open up the paperback and, oh, that's what I meant to read right now.

So that's the difference In the second edition of it, it's much more concise and I've been given the all clear, so it, it, it rounded out the ending of the book more. And again, it's, it's taking the reader deeper into their own journey so that they can explore some of what I've talked about. We've talked about their, their spider web, their family history.

I've taken, um, ho pono, pono to a whole new level. Um, and I talk about the hike that I did in Hena Springs, New Mexico, and, and. Healing on an 11 mile hike. And so it's, it's really, it's taking a person deeper into their journey because none of us are meant to be holding onto these things, and sometimes we just don't know where to go.

Passionistas: What's the most powerful thing you've learned about yourself working with your clients?

Stephanie: Uh, there's two things that come to mind. Um, don't take it personally and it's not about me. And like I said, if someone, it doesn't matter the gifts, if someone does not want to let go of a story. That's their journey, that is their free will. So to, I used to take it very personally of like, but we've done all this work and you still feel stuck.

And it was like my responsibility, which goes back to my mother's mental illness, which I took that on as my responsibility. So in, in working with clients, it's also helped me to heal some things from my earlier years. And don't take it personally. There's actually a great book entitled The Impersonal Life Little Blue Paperback book, that 95% of what people do has absolutely nothing to do with you.

It doesn't mean it doesn't affect you, it doesn't mean it wasn't really crappy. I'm not gonna swear I was going to, but I'll keep this clean. And, and it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt you, and it doesn't mean it was intended towards you.

So don't take it personally of, you know, I think of sometimes of, of going to a therapist and telling them what I wanted to say so I could hear what I wanted to hear. Well, if you hire a coach or a healer for the same thing.

Yeah. Yeah. It's our free will. Yeah.

Passionistas: Where do you see your work evolving in the next few years?

Stephanie: Healing from the stage, and I've already started, so I have, um, a masterclass, the conundrum of boundaries. The next one is being taught on September 4th, and I'm gonna start offering it monthly. And in it we do a guided visualization with energy healing.

So healing from the stage isn't necessarily standing on a literal stage. Really, anytime I'm teaching a workshop or a masterclass, there's energy healing that comes with it. So there's, there's energy healing in all that I do and going deeper into that. 'cause I think that's what many of us need the most and crave the most.

Passionistas: Yeah. Do you think you have another book in you?

Stephanie: Oh, it's, it's the first draft is almost done and it's going deeper into the boundaries work. And I even think about the first book, it was marginally about boundaries. And the second one, um. It's very interesting 'cause when I was first diagnosed with breast cancer, I took six months off from writing it and probably about 90% of what I wrote did not end up in the first edition.

And yet I still have all of that material. And so it's going much deeper into, um, the boundaries work and 'cause I think people don't understand how much we've given away. Through our lack of boundaries. And part of it too, I think is if you weren't taught, sometimes there is the expectation. Like you're supposed to know what a boundary is what and but if you weren't taught, so give yourself some grace.

Passionistas: Yeah.

Stephanie: Because most of us don't know. I didn't know.

Passionistas: Yeah, absolutely. So how can people get in touch with you if they'd like more information?

Stephanie: The best way is my website, which is wave the diamond warrior.com. I have, um, some meditations that are on there that folks can sign up for, to download. There's information about my classes and podcasts and info about my books and there's, and my blog.

So there's a lot of, that's the best way and then they can connect, um. To the socials as well, if they want to.

Passionistas: What's the question? We're not asking about setting boundaries.

Stephanie: Why does it matter?

Passionistas: Why does it matter? And the answer?

Stephanie: Because we are all sovereign beings and we are meant to live in our own truth. Not the truth or the rules of someone else, and as long as we're living in someone else's truth or their rules, we're not in our own sovereignty.

Passionistas: So one last two part question. Mm-hmm. What's your dream for yourself and what's your dream for women?

Stephanie: So my, I'm gonna start with my dream for women is. For us all to be at peace, and that's actually the signature on all of my emails is peace. It's coming to a place of internal peace that no matter what is happening in the world around us, we don't get pulled into the drama of it.

It doesn't mean that we don't see it. It doesn't mean that we don't do something about it. And yet when we're being pulled into someone else's drama, we're being pulled into their story. So for all of us to be at peace and to support each other in bringing all of our gifts to the world, and for me it's, it's interesting because in the last year, I've lost both of my parents.

And I'm in this liminal space again, kind of like how I was after I left Wall Street and it's okay, what's the next chapter? And I think it is really being, part of it is being the go-to expert about boundaries and what they mean for healing trauma and for us to stand in our power. And I'm, I'm walking my talk.

So it's continuing to expand this message so that people know that no can be a one word answer. Yes, we can stand in our power. No, we don't have to put up with toxic codependency. And yes, boundaries can be really sexy.

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